Displaying items by tag: bozo schofield

Some bozos, my friend - just dont give up. 

Nor do they listen to advice - even when it's good for them. But thats ok, if they did - they would not be Bozos! 

(such as lot of people on this list who won't buy products "because they're too expensive" - anyway, more on that below). 

I can still hear Chuck telling the Bozo, despairing of his million rants, and perhaps even, as he did all those years ago, sympathizing with the But(t) Buttling Butler "once" - or a little. 

Poor guy, chuck probably still thinks. 

and therefore, Chuck, you enable him again ... 

But anyway, despite what he's done to Chuck and Chuck's weird obsession with Bozo ("he's one of the few friends I have" - well, the fewer the better, but hey, who is yours truly to say eh. Hehe. I certainly ain't Rockefeller, Chuck!)

He was great. 

But, he doesnt make it into the list of greats - top greats for me. 

Ford and Bezos do. 

And the advice, you ask 

As you read this, remember what I said about Bezos saying about PASSION. 

You dont choose your passion. IT chooses YOU. 

Remember what I said. 

You don't chase your passion. It chases you. 

(consciously you don't, unconsciously it does, hence RESULTS!!!!!!!) 

Trust me on both fronts, it's true. 

"Just ignore him! He'll get bored after a while!" 

Except, Rahul didnt ignore the Bozo. Hehe. 

I might consciously ignore him, and did all those years ago even subconsciously i.e. "let bozos be bozos" after he trolled, but these days, while I might pull that act again, I'm not quite ready to do so yet. 

But, that isn't important, really. 

Whats important is this, friend. 

Bozo will never forget me - because he's literally OBESESSED with me. 

PASSIONATE about seeing what "Rahul is up to". 

Perhaps even more so than some of my great customers, hehe. 

And I can feel him looking on as I type this. 

Believe me, silence is golden, so many people dont say much these days, but they ALL READ. Hehe. 

And for the Bozo, trolling and hating Rahul (an dothers, but Rahul bieng #1) is a passion. 

He will never outgrow that, hehe. 

IT will chase him, as will the ass whippings that I enjoy - dispensing so much - and he loves getting so much. 


I better not go there. 

But yeah, other than those things, and being Josie's toilet, or servant, or other rubbish, best not go there - again. Bozo loves some things about me that you REALLY don't want to know about. 

And I REALLY DONT want to think about, it makes me SHUDDER. 


El creepo is the Bozo, and thats putting it lightly for Schofield, as many of the women he's cheated would agree. 

Or, lunatic par excellence. 

But it brings up that point I brought up before, friend. 

IF YOU on this list "want" to get something but never do "because of money" - then YOU, I'm sorry to say are NOT passionate about fitness, and will never get into the best shape of your life. 

I've recieved emails for months on Animal Kingdom Workouts from people "that would buy if the price wasn't so high". 

I never reduced the price an iota. 

I increased it. 

Because if you're truly passionate, friend, you'l find a way - and likely have already. 

If you truly want it, you'll fork out the bucks for what matters. 

And those that arent, and no, it isn't about the crazy world, finances, or any other nonsense. 

It boils down to this. 

DO YOU want it? 


Then come get it!

And that, friend, is all there is to say. Come to think of it, if you really want it, I wouldn't be asking you this right now ... 


Rahul Mookerjee

PS - Sorry, Luke. I'd love to, but nothing doing! 

(An extremely polite dude, but price, it will remain what it IS) 

(it might even go UP - probably will). 

(no I aint worrying about if people will buy. Like I said...) 

Published in Misc.
Tagged under

I've been having dreams galore my friend - vivid ones at that! 

Can't wait to see what the day brings - good, bad or ugly. 

But I thought about writing about this to you before loppping off last night, so I am now - and oh, if you haven't, remember to take advantage of our special offer going on - I see, as I check my emails, lots of you have already done so - "if you buy something using the coupon I sent out yesterday" - I'll match it! 

That offer, as mentioned has expired now - but thanks to all of you that stepped up - and took action! 

Anyway, to me, that - what I'm about to tell you, in this "tea inspired" email of mine is the endearing image of Glyn Bozo.

Despite his typical Tom Tomming, despite all the nonsense he posts on Freakbook etc - THAT is the real Glyn. 

Face down, in his underpants, on the roads in Jieyang I believe - drunkenly snoring without a care in the world - after being kicked out of Chuck's beer house. 

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw it that morning a couple of years ago on my phone - or actually, it didnt surprise me. 

Nothing Glyn related ever does! 

And Chuck told me the entire story i.e. how he threw a hissy fit, trashed their house, made overtures to chuck's girlfriend - all of these things (oddly enough, that girl kept inviting the bozo back - must be a sucker for punishement. Ugh) of course, weren't news to me. Every three months, the Bozo used to go "loco" i.e. Hannibal or Dr Jekyll - or was it Mr Hyde?? - and do things that would keep most people away from him for a lifetime, even more oddly, he's just show up later sober and say a whiny "sorry Chuck", and Chuck would forgive all. 

Made for the ages that "partnership" was! 

Made for each other? 

Anyway, the latest was that the Bozo got kicked out of Chuck's house - showed up drunk again - broke into "The Chuck's" beer house (he made damn good beer - say what you might about Charles, but he made damn good beer!!) - and drank all of it up. 

Got found out, and got picked up - literally- by the seat of his pants, and got thrown out - where he slept it off apparently. 

When he came to his senses, he whined to the cops about how "he got thrown out". 

Most places, the cops would boot him out too. 

The China cops took pity on the fat foreign devil sweating nasty buckets and bullets under the blazing hot sun - asked Chuck and Kate to take him back. 

Doubt they ever did. 

I remember telling Chuck specifically NOT TO. 

Anyway, say what you might about Chuck agin - but dude makes damn good beer. 

He's not a thief either. Honest guy - despite his China Tom Tomming and constant "overtures" to me to NOT say it like it is (which of course, I wrote about here) ... 

Sad he had to go the "Tom Tom" route as well, but hey, to each his own. 

True, he wasn't exactly overly honest about the Bozo's racist trolling which he knew about for a long, long time before I came to know of it. 

Bozo claims he started it. 

Did he? 

Till date, I dont have a definitive answer. 

But I dont think he did. Chuck probably chuckled a bit at them and never told me, but he's not the sort of dude that you'd call racist. I wouldn't at least! 

These things can be FELT - plain and simple. 

Anyway, that to me is Glyn Bozo's legacy in China basically - of course, from there, he got kicked out for visa overstays, then did drugs galore in Hong Kong's ghettos, stole money and trashed places there - and then finally almost got booted out from there as well (if they had the National Security Law back then, Bozo would be in for sure - though NOT because of "anti China" behavior - just general and utter lunacy) - and then Chuck was, for some reason, kind enough to fly him back to Ole Blighty. 

Anyway .... 

Dont know why I felt compelled to tell you that - since last night? 

But China, my friend, despite the fact they spread this damned pestilence and were fully prepared for it ... has changed a LOT since 2019. A lot, I'll tell you that!

From mandatory (practically speaking, since you can't really do much other than step out of the house if you ain't been panixated - no subway, no Didi Taxi, no restaurant or what not) panixations to enforced qurantines, to foreign devils getting anal swabs upon entry and much more - and of course, the Orwellian surveilliance everywhere been taken to giddy limits ... 

... Lots of countries and places have, for one. 

But China, and these Tom Tom's running around - remember one thing. 

With mandatory 14 day quarantines at your own expense, I dont think a lot of these Tom Tom's will be doing visa runs etc any more i.e. pop off to HK and then back again to "reset" your 30 day or 60 day stay or whatever you get on the visa ... (which was intended to be a business visa, never a "stay" visa as a lot of these Tom Tom's did, running around on business and tourist visas for ages) . . . 

Think about it. 

14 day hotel stay - where you can't put foof outside the door, period. 

On both sides of the border if I've got it right. 

Then another 14, or 44 at your apartment, and then rinse, repeat. 

Even the Tom Tom's wouldn't put up with that - the smart ones. 

True, they may eventually work out a system for these sort where visa runs or whatever are exempted, but given the visa runs themselves are quasi legal in the first place, I dont think so. 

And given that all visas issued pre-March 2020 are invalid anyway - and given that new business visas etc aren't being issued without very stringent requirements (you have to have the China panixine for one) - life for these Tom Tom's has become very interesting. 

Sure, for those of us - or them - or you (lots of Tom toms reading this) that were already in China then - yes - visas were extended month by month on a humanitarian basis. 

But China starting June stopped doing that. 

i.e. we've basically given you visa free stay for over a year. 

Now it's time to pack up, go home fellas, and if you gotta return, do so legally, and with a real visa. 

I dont blame China for doing that. 

Most countries would - and should (unless you're Hiden Biden who seems to revel in inviting a bunch of illegal immigrants in at the border daily with open arms - in most cases people that add NOTHING to the American economy. Strange, but predictable - with Sleepy Joe in charge, that was always going to happen, especially when he batted it off to Kamala who hasn't even been to the border, and laughs like a hyena when she's questioned on it!) . . . 

Some of these Tom Toms's got a monkey job willing to give 'em a visa. 

Some of them got married (pleasssssssssssssssssssssse Madam!) 


I remember a Chinese dude in NY once asking me "why I didnt get married to her" or some nonsense to "get a passport or what not" (though he wasnt aware of my immigration or other status anyway - he just assumed I was going to "have to leave"!) . . . 

I told him, nothing doing. 

I dont marry for passports, visas, or stays - period!

That may be overly "moralistic", but in some things I am that - simplistic as well!

Chuck from what I hear once did that for some student loan nonsense. 

Hey, good on him. To each his own! 

I would NEVER do something like that - not because of right or wrong - well, actually it is that. It's just plain WRONG, simple. 

Gaming the system - and while sometimes its acceptable, to me, getting married for something like that would spell out LOSER in big capital letters - in RED at that - to me. 

And some of these Tom Tom's started a company tom tomming about "Nowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww is the best time to do busines in China" (it ain't either). 

But in general, most of them have quietly left with their tail between their legs, quietly steaming about how the country they Tom Tommed could do this to them. 

Get real, fellas. 

China doesn't need Tom Tom's of that nature - its the Tom Tom's who have got NOTHING back home and wouldn't be accepted back home as anything but bottom of the barrel scum and losers that need it!

And no country will give you free visa extensions forever - simple fact of life. 

What I dont like most about the Tom toms? 

Well, their blatant hypocrisy for one - like HERE

And two, of course, the way they diss their own countries attempting to pass themselves off as Chinese "we" - and their OWN countries - their great democracies like Australia and the US - as "them" - and saying everything bad about them possible, while Tom Tomming the evil Chinese regime. THAT is what I hate the most. 

And of course, telling those of us with a voice to keep it down. 

Fuck that. 

Never have, never ever will regardless of where I might be! 

Friend, here's the fact - you'll never ever be Chinese!

Simple fact of life ... and it's YOUR countries that allow you to go to China in the first place with those long term visas and what not (which have all been invalidated as of now).

And you turn around and bite the very hand that feeds you!


Anyway, I had all this on my mind since last night. 

Now, I've told you. I feel better! 

And thanks again to all of you that stepped up and TOOK ACTION for the great "once in a lifetime "offer we had going on yesterday - much appreciated!

I'll probably do something like that soon again ... 

As for now remember - Lumberjack "Lodestone" Fitness is the next book out - hot on my heels as it were!

Pick this up now - remember to use the code for the discount on the pre-order we have going on! 

I'll see you soon. 


Rahul Mookerjee

PS - All of this of course, probably comes as news to the Bozo. All he really recalls is "waking up in his underwear" in the middle of the street, no passport in hand (apparently he owed Chuck lots of money, and Chuck wasn't going to return the passport until he paid up or some rubbish - which Idont blame Chuck for, hehe) . . . 

For the ages, this one, and the Bozo. Hehe. To read, simmer and stew. 

But hey, as Bill said, my friend. 

"If you hadn't done what you did to Rahul - then maybe he wouldn't be doing this to you now!" 

Goose and gander, friend. 

Roney was a smart dude who YOU trolled - made nasty comments about - and besmirched his character multiple times. You've done that to too many people, Glyn ... 

Anyway, enough on that. Back soon!

(I'll share the pics soon on Instagram or what not. Rarely use it, but might as well! Including some specials which even Chuck doesn't have a clue about - like the credit card the Bozo was doing crack or what on. Hehe. All in the offiing!)

PG Wodehouse, I love you!

Published in Misc.
Tagged under

I mean , really. 

Normally he's up in arms sending me inane rants, comments etc about him being a "blow-innaire" or what not (the terms he comes up with, I've gotta really stop and wonder!) - but this time? 

When he's getting literally money tossed at him (dancing monkey style)? 

Which of course he believes is the epitome of professional jobs and what not, so I dont get it - Ada and I dont either. 

I believe this Ada also helped the Bozo would with 5000 bucks once - which for the life of Charles, me and several others couldn't figure out why - but that was the Bozo pulling the "sorry ole me" trick on her, I'm sure. Hey, even I fell for it initially and I ain't an easy man to fool. 

But I also only showed him what I wanted to in terms of the fitness and other businesses, hehe. That GUT is never ever wrong!

Anyway, Glyn, if you're reading this ... 

All we're trying to do is get you a job. 

We hope you'll straighten your life out, though truth be told, if Ada hadn't badgered me up and down I wouldn't be writing this or saying it as I have on WeShat etc (ask those in the know, and they'llt ell ya). 

We hope, but it might well be a vain hope! 

(Ada is the recruiter, for what its worth). 

Anyway ... 

If yall hear of the Bozo, let me know! 

But beyond that, the main reason I'm writing this is "getting back". 

LOTS OF you still have not gotten back with your review of Isometric and Flexibility Training - one of my most revolutionary courses as yet jam packed with info that has never been put together in the format I'm putting it in now. 

And lots of you have NOT gotten back with the Animal Kingdom Workouts review ... and many more! 

And, if you have questions in general - remember - Bozo or not - I'm always here - for YOU!

And that, my friend is that. 

Back soon


Rahul Mookerjee

Published in Misc.
Tagged under

The Bozo is two things, my friend. Or three. 

One, he's infestng Ole Blighty, and some on the list have asked "where he lives" (in respons eto my latest email on it). 

Two, I dont know where he lives, but I think Birimingham, but I wouldn't bet upon it! 

The Bozo only lives in dark holes he "licks" and Mommy's basement, or on the STREET after being thrown out, face down, out of Chuck's house for stealing his beer. LOL. 

I've got proof, right down to the Bozo going to the cops and begging to be "let back in". 


But I'm not going to post it here. Some things are truly members only for members to have a chuckle at, including the infamous "Josie" screen captures ... 

(But remember, you get FREE access to everythign I offer with one membership to the site - so jump aboard now. Truly VALUE BEYOND COMPARE the bodyweight GURU is offering you HERE ...) 

And three, the Bozo never disappoints. 

Either to give me ideas to write about, or to give me a huge, huge laugh. 

Here is what yours truly just got in the Inbox. 

Name: Birmingham butt bouncer banana boat benefits bozo

Email: piublicASSistance @ g-mail.com

Name : rahultheUglypaki @ gm-ail.com

Email: oxfordbozo

(Bozo got two the fields mixed up the second time around, lol). 

Name: Jose Arias (this was a genuine sign up, by the way) 


Anyway, for new sign ups, emails etc are working fine, it's just the regular list that needs to be tweaked. 

But really, the Bozo. 

Right on target after the racist memes, hehe. 

Anyway, this "ugly Paki" has a lot to teach you and the Bozo, who called him a "fitness God bar none" recently about FITNESS. 

That being, that "butt bouncing workouts" truly do BURN FAT. 

Believe me, the more you shake it, the more you LOSE IT. 

Thats an alien concept to the Bozo shaking his non existent "wang doodle". 

But I'm talking shaking in a good way. 

Workouts that truly make you feel uncomfortable and SHAKE the fat up from the inside out. 

And the best example is jumping rope workouts - and I've put out the best book ever on jumping rope, unlike anything ANYONE has put out there (I challenge you to find one better, much like with Pushup Central, its natural BROTHER) - which you really need to get now. 

EVERYONE can jump rope, my friend - everyone. 

The only exception being, of course, if you're injured - or have pre-existing conditions that do not allow you to use the feet and legs as they should be "naturally". 

For example, people with lower back surgery and ify ou'e got a foot that "acts up" often - then you might be best off NOT jumping rope or sprinting with it ... 

But even then, there's plenty of bounch workouts you can do. (not in the hay, hehe). 

One, mountain climbers, thats a great exercise I havent covered a lot but will be in the upcoming book on SUPER PLYOMETRICS!

Two, Hindu jumper squats ... 

And three, the JUMPING squats I cover so well in Animal Kingdom Workouts in a style that is brutal, simple, and yet NOT seen out there. 

And many others, of course, but these are a few. 

Remember, bounce, burn, and lose is a truism of fitness. 

Get you some now, bro. 


Rahul Mookerjee

PS - The Bozo, much like apes do has a fascination with "bananas", but I wouldn't denigrate the poor ape with the comparison, hehe. The Bozo is more into wang doodles than actual bananes, but on that note - remember - working out like a REAL APE - REAL MAN style will give you strength and conditioning bar none that you can only DREAM of. Get the premier book on it HERE

PS #2 - The Bozo's next step is to finangle someone's "real Oxford email addy "and sign up with it. Watch this space for more hilarity while you get the books ABOVE!

Published in Misc.

IN case he’s reading it, and from the teeth gnashing I can hear across the pond, yes, he is!

And the point of me saying this is to ...well, rile him up a little more, but also have mercy on him

As Glenn once said about a certain idiot “Thomas”, “we’ll let him be for now”.


Curiously enough, or maybe not Glenn (a stellar dude!!) was who I gave “Keeping it Real in China” to, and the Bozo got it from him.

Now without further ado, here it is 

Bozo Schofield, here it is.

If you’ve had enough, say th efollowing PUBLICLY. Hehe.

“Rahul, you’re right. I’m indeed a jackass that did everything you said, and what the others have said too.

I’ve never worked out in my pathetic little life, and I apologize for trolling you on Amazon”.

Now, in case you, my dear Schofield don’t want to say it?

Hey, no problem.

Say the opposite, and fume a bit more.

On Amazon at that. Honestly, you’ve got no idea how much money you made and make me, so please – keep going (ther’es another G right there, hehe).

Now, Gorillas aside, you could also say the following.

(please do NOT, I beg you, repeat the name of the gorilla part that turns you on the most. It ain’t the BLACK HAIR, I’ll say that. Hehe).

“Jahapanna, Tussi GREAT HO!”

And please do not even think of doing what the guy did in 3 Idiots after saying that to the “3 idiots”, hehe.


Anyway, your call.

Do a Tony Grieg.



(and for those reading – that “satirical” groveling on the cricket field by Greig, should NOT, I repeat NOT be taken as something negative against ole Tony. He was a GREAT – we ALL MISS HIM! And he was a real man, unlike ...ah, but you get my drift!).

Anyway, I’ll be back soon.

Until them, feast yerself on the Gorilla Grip series …


Rahul Mookerjee

PS – And now, I think that should be THAT for the day. Off to count a G or so!

PS #2 – Bozo, in case you’re wondering, NO, your emails don’t reach me. Your IP is blocked. And so are all the other alternate ones you use, hehe. Unfortunately much like your public trolling, and attempts to besmirch yours truly lovely indeed Gorilla like reputation, redeeming yourself needs to be done PUBLICLY too.

If not Amazon you name the platform. LOL.

Seriously guys. This Schofield is the best. Lmao.

Published in Misc.
Tagged under